One Man’s Private Struggle with Lust – By Santiago Dominguez

IMG_1504My service as a church officer in a South American field went well until I fell to the temptation of pornography. The problem had started during my youth, but God had helped me overcome for some time. But then the problem started again, especially during work trips, when staying alone at night in hotel rooms. It was very awkward to fall asleep during the sessions of the division executive committee the next day knowing that I had stayed up late the previous night watching pornography on the TV or computer. I felt horrible knowing I was living in hypocrisy, and I desperately wanted deliverance.

Day after day, I cried to God for victory. And yet, I kept falling. I shared my struggle with my wife. For some months the victory would be won, but then I would fall again. Knowing I was trapped by the same addiction that many around the world face (51 percent of Christians admit pornography is a temptation, and 37 percent say it’s a current struggle) made me very discouraged. Here I was encouraging other pastors and church leaders to live holy lives, but I was unable to live this life myself.

As my family and I moved to another continent to work as missionaries, I prayed more earnestly for God to act powerfully in my life. With no work trips, the temptations were reduced to times after disagreements with my wife. Then with no TV and a heavy Internet control on computers, temptations were reduced to the cell phone, but still falling short of full victory and freedom. While I was trying earnestly, my heart was not yet fully yielded to the power of God, that is, until one evening, during a Wednesday night prayer meeting.

During this particular week, I heard two individuals talking about the devastating consequences of pornography. Then they began sharing ways to help one overcome sexual addiction, followed by a call for those in the audience to commit themselves to sexual purity and self-discipline, by signing a promise to do all in our power to keep ourselves morally and sexually pure. As I signed, I poured my heart out to God and asked Him, once and for all, to help me resist all pornography temptations. As I prayed I felt that God was touching my shoulder and telling me: “I will help you.” And help me, He did!

Almost five years have passed and I praise the Lord that I have not fallen a single time. Truly God is faithful to keep His promises when we cry to Him for help!

If you are among the 4 out of 10 Christians who view pornography daily, don’t give up, because Jesus has not given up on you. Pray earnestly and He will deliver you.

Santiago Dominguez is a missionary who is writing under a pseudonym.

Note: To view this week’s world church prayer requests, click here!

To download & print this blog, as well as this week’s prayer requests, click here!

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  • PNB

    Brother ‘Santiago’, thank you for being courageous to provide your testimony of victory in Jesus Christ over the power of lust. God’s power is truly all encompassing.
    – Peter Nigel

  • Yvonne Fullerton-lee

    That old serpent wants us to believe that God will not hear nor deliver us us from the lust or temptations that we face as christians. But God is ever faithful, and when we ask in sincerity of heart, He will deliver us. So let’s hold to His promises and trust Him.

  • Esther

    Thank you for sharing your testimony brother. Satan takes us captives to do his will, but victory comes through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

  • Cynthia Duncan Mercer

    I am all too familiar with the ravages of the grip of lust/pornography. My husband was enslaved for the first 7 years of our marraige… I praise God for his surrender and His commitment to serve Jesus!! And I praise God for your perseverance to keep fighting the good fight!! There truly is Victory in Jesus!!! Great is His faithfulness! Thank you for sharing!!

  • John Gilmore

    The devil would break all of us down, some with one failing, others another way. But Jesus “is able to keep [us} from falling” (Jude 24). Praise the Lord!

  • Nonhlanhla Masuku

    Thank you so much for the testimony, May you continue to grow in favor with God,

  • Eding Sevilla Dela Cruz

    God has given us an examples in the Bible and hearing/reading testimonies overcoming temptations and addictions, so rest assured God’s wonderful promises are effective and true. Teach us oh Lord God to be totally dependent upon you, may the Holy Spirit guide us in every decision we make. If we remain in Him, God will never leave us nor forsake us. Thank you God the Father, and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and our God the Holy Spirit for abiding in us. I pray in the mighty name of Jesus. Amen!

  • Seth

    Thank you for sharing this most difficult to share testimony. Confessing and repenting and praying over the problem and praying as man for each other is the major step forward to solve this problem. May Gods grace save us from this devastating temptation that is affecting almost 50 % of men. We are completely dependant on your saving grace through faith in Jesus. Amen

    • Winn

      If men and women will choose like Job not to look on another to lust after that person Jesus will supply the power to do that daily.

  • Jerry

    The victory is in Jesus! The enemy tries to keep us ensnared in fighting our problem; porn, tobacco, drugs, or whatever it may be. We will always fail that way. However, every time you or I meet temptation with a little prayer and or scripture, Jesus will give us victory. HE has never failed me in this. Do not fight the enemy! “Fight the good fight of faith” to get with Jesus and stay with Him.

    • Winn

      Amen Jerry. As we fight the good fight of faith Jesus will fight our battles for us. What a loving God!

    • Thembie Mapingire

      Amen Jerry. Yes it is the fight of faith that gives us victory. Amen

    • Catecha Francis

      Amen! Faith is the Victory that over cometh the World. There is nothing too hard for the Lord to do for us. I’m often reminded of the hymn:
      “I was sinking deep in sin,
      far from the peaceful shore,
      Very deeply stained within,
      Sinking to rise no more.
      But the Master of the sea
      Heard my despairing cry,
      From the waters lifted me,
      Now safe am I.

      Love lifted me.
      Love lifted me!
      When nothing else could help,
      Love lifted me.
      Love lifted me, Love lifted me!
      When nothing else could help
      Love lifted me.

      Souls in danger look above
      Jesus completely saves
      He will lift you by His love
      Out of the angry waves
      But the Master of the sea
      Billows His will obey
      He your Saviour wants to be
      Be saved today.”

      When we find ourselves sinking deeper and deeper in sin, and think there is no way out. Take comfort in the words of this hymn. Jesus is the answer to our sin problem. The best friend to have is Jesus. He will hear you when you call, He’ll help you when you fall, the best friend to have s Jesus.

      A blessed day to you all.

  • zoneiz02

    Praise God for He is forever faithful!

  • Gloria Mosha-Onchiri

    Amen.Powerful Testimony only God can do this.We thank you for sharing this testimony!

  • Blyden

    I saw a program on Hope Channel that also addressed this topic. I am glad we as a church are talking about it and praying about it:

  • Wojtek Janiuk